As most of you reading this are aware, our youngest daughter Isla was diagnosed with a cancer called Neuroblastoma in April 2009 at just 5 months old. The rest of 2009 was given to taking care of Isla the best we could, taking each day at a time and keeping hope in our hearts. At the beginning of 2010, we were told that Isla's cancer hadn't responded as well to treatment as they had hoped. I got the urge to do something. Her fate was out of our control. On a whim I decided to shave off my hair to raise money for Cancer Research UK. The previous month Isla had been given one of their 'Little Star' awards. The charity is quite high profile, and the first that sprang to mind.
We were overwhelmed with the support we received. We reached our fundraising target in 24 hours. People wanted to give because they wanted to show support for us and what we were going through. We were extremely touched. As soon as I shaved off my hair, I signed up to do a Skydive and with some more looking into it picked 'Sparks' charity and their Neuroblastoma appeal which funds research into treatment. Ross also decided to do a whole body wax for the Neuroblastoma Society.
That was the beginning for us and our involvement in fundraising. That year we were also approached by people suggesting we open an appeal for Isla to fund treatment should she ever need treatment that couldn't be offered in the UK. We discussed opening an appeal for a long time, we were never entirely convinced it was the right thing to do, but it felt like having a safety net for Isla and options for us should she ever relapse. Isla's appeal opened at the end of 2010. One of the benefits of her appeal, was we would have a say in what happened to the money in Isla's appeal should she never need it, and we were keen that any money was donated to research into Neuroblastoma. That same year, we were also told of how big charities like Cancer Research actually donate very little to research into children's cancer, but most of their advertising uses children in the hope of generating donations, that the big wigs at the top of these big charities receive very large wages.
In October 2010, we also had a family ceremony, like a proper wedding on our first wedding anniversary. Again, we didn't want gifts, but took the opportunity to have a collection for 3 charities, Yorkhill, Archie and SSAFA. When Isla was declared in remission, we held a fundraising family disco for Malcolm Sargent House, Calum's Cabin and the Christian Lewis Trust, who all provided us with holidays near the end of Isla's treatment.
We stopped actively fundraising for Isla's appeal in 2012, As well as it being very difficult to fundraise, and to fundraise for your own child, we were also unhappy with the actions of the lady who ran the charity. We had been made aware of some things she had done to people, and we felt we couldn't carry on. In over two years, with the help and support of a lot of friends we managed to raise about £20,000, and we will be eternally grateful to all who supported us in anyway. We were left feeling emotionally drained from the fundraising, and it was often difficult to feel positive when others would let you down. Worse than feeling drained, was the feeling that the charity we had supported for the benefit of very sick children was being mismanaged by someone with serious character flaws. It is difficult to get your head around someone who lost their own child, using that situation to take advantage of others, but it appears that is what she did.
This didn't put us off fundraising, and when we heard about the first Speyside Kiltwalk we jumped at the chance to fundraise again. We were looking at organising our own event that summer, but it looked like it would take a lot of planning, and we just didn't know if we were emotionally ready for the challenge so soon after the previous few years. An organised event like that allowed us to just do something that was being organised by others. After our fist Kiltwalk, we were hooked. We were also amazed at how well planned and organised the event was. We didn't expect the regular pit stops and the water and snacks on offer to keep you going. We thought that really did go above and beyond, but it was our first experience of this type of event and we didn't know what to expect. Personally we got a lot out of that first walk; a challenge that focussed our thoughts on children in Scotland who need help. Having witnessed first hand Intensive Care and a children's Oncology ward, we know the battle and the horrors some young lives face, by walking 26 miles and putting up with some discomfort is nothing compared to what we have witnessed.
Our love of Kiltwalk began. We decided we didn't need to go through the blood, sweat and tears of organising our own event. We could take part and give back to our local charity 'Logan's Fund'. We thought it was a brilliant concept to have a team of 5 and to nominate your own charity to receive 50% of the funds you raise through the Kiltwalk, similar to having our own event but without the stress involved. The remaining 50% of the funds you raise was to be split between the nominated Kiltwalk charities. Fundraising for a local charity made sense to us after our experiences, and for people we knew, and a charity that had helped us was the perfect answer.
In 2013, we decided to take part in 3 Kiltwalk's. After we completed the first in Glasgow, we were still overwhelmed with what a brilliant concept it was, how well run it was and overwhelmed with the provisions too. I was surprised when I viewed the Kiltwalk Facebook page the next day to see people complaining about lack of water/snacks and the suggestion of different colour t shirt, as people who walked 26 miles and found it tough were not happy seeing people looking fresh at the end only to discover they hadn't walked as far as them. For me, I don't care the distance people walk, or their reasons for walking different distances. It really is the taking part that deserves to be rewarded.
I find my tolerance for people who like to complain is much lower than before Isla's diagnosis and treatment. I also note that feedback, which is negative is often acted upon in the hope of preventing more complaints. From what I've observed, people will just look for something else to complain about. I wonder about the people who complain. Have they watched their own and other children/loved ones close to them suffer? I have a motto I try to live by and that is 'don't sweat the small stuff'. If it's not worth complaining about, then don't. I am not a complainer. I've worked in shops and restaurants and been the brunt of peoples complaining, most times unjust, but not always. It would take a lot for me to complain. Usually I view the positives and try to remind myself to let people know when they've been doing a great job. Too often peoples good work goes unrewarded. Mind you, I am quite a sensitive soul! I know I'm not the only sensitive soul, and I hate to see the hard work done by some torn down. I also wake up every morning feeling lucky that Isla is still with us, every single morning, she is my first thought. Being one of the lucky ones in life, what do I have to complain about?
For me, the Kiltwalk has been a very positive experience, we get a lot out of it emotionally - connecting with others who feel the same way as us, or who have similar stories to tell. For Logan's Fund, the benefit has been huge, there is a sense of a team working to do good for a situation that shouldn't exist. We can help the put smiles on faces where there could be only worry. Logan's Fund has grown, and is hoping to purchase a caravan to offer respite holidays in Lossiemouth for families who really do need a break away from the crap they face. Helping one family forget about their stresses for one week is a huge thing, I know. Luckily we experienced that when we had our holiday to Calum's Cabin. I can't describe exactly what Bute now means to me, but it will always have a piece of my heart.
Recently, the Kiltwalk organisation has had some negative press, partner charities pulling out. Questions over the cost of running the events. Due to the press picking up on the stories, there has been further speculation about how the Kiltwalk is run, people in the organisation have lost their jobs. People who have worked hard, thought they were making the right decisions. I don't know the ins and outs of what has gone on in the charity, and that is why I haven't wanted to comment before. I really feel for the people who have worked hard. The sociological side of me will always look to get all the facts before making a judgement, it's just how I am. I don't jump on a bandwagon. What I do know is the events are well run, and local charities see the benefit as well as large charities. This surely is only a good thing? I do not know if there are real problems within the charity, if it is badly run? Previous experience is making me cautious before rushing to their defence. I do know that in any organisation, not everyone will be happy with decisions made. As a nation, we are too quick to judge and complain, and not focus on the good. Maybe the media is partly to blame for this? Always reporting on the negative and hardly focussing on the good stuff.
This year, I have set myself a challenge of climbing Kilimanjaro with the Kiltwalk as well as taking part in their walks. I have to fundraise £4,200. Half of that is the cost of the trip. The rest will go back to Logan's Fund. A step closer to their own caravan. I am committed to trying to fund as much of the cost of the trip as possible, selling things, paying my own way, organising fundraising events. I know how much of a commitment the fundraising is, I've done it before. The knock backs or lack of support can sometimes be tough, but experience has taught me to be grateful for ever little bit of support we receive. I've had the benefit of a break from organising events, so feel emotionally ready for it again. I know when the year is out, I'll be looking to scale back on our fundraising again, maybe a break or maybe only one Kiltwalk a year? I will continue to try to repay the Universe for not taking Isla from us. I will continue to wake up every morning feeling lucky.
